Response to Failure is what demarcates a successful person from a person who has failed. When you fail, you become vulnerable by becoming open to interpretation by others.  You suffer from victimization, self-pity and also tend to catastrophize the event. But, No failure is final! You have to choose deliberately what you infer from the event of failure; Either it will be an excuse or a legendary story behind your success. Embrace vulnerability and let your wounds be out in the open; It is only when you accept the shortcomings that you grow out of them.

Attitude is the only Important factor in trying times…

A Study was done by Psychologist Albert Bandura to find out the role of attitudes in the face of failure. He segregated people into two groups and made each group perform an identical management task. Group A was told that the study was to test their management abilities and the Group B was told that the task was just an opportunity to improve, practice and be re-done.  The Researchers intentionally made the task very difficult so that each one fails at it.

Group A, Felt like losers because they weren’t able to perform and were also not able to make any improvement when given a second chance. While, Group B, performed progressively higher with each trial and looked at the failure as an opportunity to improve. When the two groups were asked to rate themselves, Group B was found to be more confident than Group A.

The next time you fail and catch yourself wallowing in self-pity, Focus on the most important thing you can control: Attitude

Keep these in mind when you encounter a failure:

• Everything that is good takes time to happen! Author Gladwell said that, if you want to be a master of anything, invest 10,000 hours of tireless focus.
• Check whether you are Just busy or Productive. Realise that success is not the result of movement but a child of undivided focus. You are the product of your output, not effort.
• Internalise that some events are always out of your control, however, how you react to these is always within your control. Your attitude will turn a mistake into a learning experience and will also ensure that your ego doesn’t go through the roof when you arrive victoriously.
• Do something that makes you feel good about yourself rather than comparing yourself to others. Your self- worth must come from Inside, not from the evaluation of others; that is a very flimsy ground to stay on.
• Perfection is a Fiction. Human beings are bound to make mistakes. If being perfect is your goal you will always fail. Just Try to be better than yesterday.

You will regret nothing but the chances that you didn’t Take. Not that you should take mindless risks but calculated risk. When taking a road less traveled ask yourself “ What is the worst that could happen?”. The worst thing that could possibly happen to you is that you allow yourself to die while you are still alive.

If you want to be successful, learn from your experiences. Learn from the failures and from the triumphs.

Keep changing yourself for the better!

Learn more About Dr Prerna Kohli

Also, read About Procrastination

If you constantly feel like a failure, Take our test on Depression.