The Happiness Quotient

You are obsessed with happiness, and it eludes you at every step.

If you see the commercials on the television or all the products that are marketed to you; You will find one common product that all of them are selling is  “ Happiness”.

How do you find happiness and sustain it?

In a recent Research on happiness, it was found that all of us have a “Set Point”. When you buy a dream house, dream car or lose a job, there is an increase /decrease in the happiness but later you drop down to your “ set point”.

The astonishing breakthrough that the research made is that you can make yourself happy, permanently. Your genetics contribute 50 percent to the set point,10 percent is determined by life events and as much as 40 percent is completely on us. A large portion of your happiness depends on your habits, attitude, and outlook.

So, this finding also suggests that whatever you achieve in life, that happiness is not going to last forever. Happiness, therefore, is not a place that you can reach but a journey you have to take. Happiness is rooted in your daily habits, and not in an extraordinary moment of achievement.

Adopting a new habit like, being optimistic or having a positive attitude is hard, but eliminating negative habits can put your “set point” in order.

Vaccinated to Awe

Every day there are moments in your daily life that amaze you, especially in today’s technology-driven world.You should know where to look for those awe-inspiring moments. These moments make us humble and remind us that the universe is limitless and we are not the center of it. You should not allow these moments to slip off your shoulder.

Making yourself alone

Your first reaction when unhappy is to make yourself alone but it is the worst thing to do in such circumstances. Every one of us will experience days when we just want to hide under the sheets instead take the harder way. Go out and socialize. It will make the difference right away.

Blame others

You are happy when you are in control of your life and circumstances, but when you blame someone you give up your control to someone else. This is detrimental to the feelings of happiness and is bad for your mood. Blaming is giving someone else the control on your life.

Control others

You have to be in control of your life to be happy, but if you try to be happy by controlling others it can take you in the opposite direction. You should only try to control yourself to avoid nagging others. Controlling someone requires you to apply some amount of force or fear even if for a short term which will make you feel negative about yourself.

Criticize others

Judging others or criticizing is an indulgence which you would love to do but later feel guilty. All of us understand that criticizing is a bad habit though it makes us feel better momentarily unless you are a sociopath. Speaking ill of others creates a negative spiral.

Complain about things

The worst part about this is that it drives people away from you. It is a self-reinforcing behaviour. If you keep thinking about the bad state of affairs, you will reaffirm your negative beliefs. Talking about what bothers you is therapeutic and makes you feel better whereas complaining does the opposite.

Impressing others

Do not try to impress people with your car, house, dress or other material things. It is a futile endeavour. There are a lot of researchers that show that material things cannot make you happy. Find people who accept and like you for what you are.

Negative thoughts

Pessimism and negative thinking is an absolute waste of time. Even when the worst things are happening to you, there will be at least one positive thing to focus on. Pessimistic thoughts are irrational and become a self-fulfilling prophecy. When you are expecting bad things, you will most likely get bad things. Instead, choose to look at the facts behind your negative thinking.

Comparing your life to others on social media

What you see on social media is far from reality. The filtered images, lovely vacations and exciting lives that people want to portray is not real. A recent research on happiness and Facebook suggested that people who stayed away from facebook reported lower levels of sadness and higher levels of satisfaction than people who continued using Facebook.

Not  setting  goals

Goals give you hope to look forward to future. Set goals that are challenging to you and backed by your values. If you do not set goals, you will move around in all directions wondering why you are stuck and things do not change for you.

Not facing fears

Fear is just an emotion that you have imagined and blown out of proportion. It is just a negative emotion, while danger is real. You can make a choice here; Get addicted to the feeling of euphoria that you will get once you conquer your fear head-on.

Ditching  the present

The past and the future are just chemicals in your brain in the form of memory and expectancies. No amount of guilt can change your past and likewise, no amount of anxiety can change your future. Just focus on your present, the moment on which you have control. Reality is the present; you have to be here to embrace your full potential.

Accept whatever happened in your past.

Accept the future with all its uncertainties.