Case Study: Background

ABC is a large multinational company in Gurgaon. They are a team of 150 people working on the same floor. Evidently, work colleagues become your second family because you spend 60% of your waking life with them.  Recently there was the death of a young colleague at ABC company. The loss came as a shock to every other member of the organization. Thus, the company’s Human Resource manager and CEO approached Mentriq to provide a Grief Counselling to their close-knit Second family.

Objective

When there is a sudden death in an organization, coworkers are shaken. They feel the loss of Meaning in their personal goals and question the organizational goals and likewise. There is an unexplainable sense of grief and despair among the survivors.

Offer Group and Individual therapy  to ABC Company’s employees and :

• Also, Be emotionally available for employees
• Therapy to Overcome the shock
• Accept the reality of Loss
• Navigate through their own feeling as well as that of their colleagues
• Give meaning to work again
• Get on with the normal pace of life

How were the objectives achieved?

• Counselors from Mentriq were made available for the employees.
•  The Painful incident that took place a day back was narrated to the Counsellors by the CEO and HR of ABC Company
• We gave a presentation on the nature of grief.
•  Conducted group therapy in phases for two over weeks.
• We used various Interactive tools and rituals to help employees ventilate and get on with their normal Lives.

Key Results

In this ever transitory world some kind of  Loss is inevitable and with all kinds of loss comes “Grief”!

It comes with a myriad of feelings including anger, frustration, guilt, regret, helplessness, lack of control over emotions, ambiguity, prolonged sadness or depression etc. Since the set of emotions, a person experience is dependent on the nature of the relationship with the object of loss. Hence, people generally bounce between different thoughts while trying to figure out a meaning of their loss.

• The employees felt empowered.
• We were able to re-establish the interaction between the organizational objectives vis a vis the employee’s personal objectives.
• We were able to bring in an increase in employee motivation and morale hence, reducing the stress, negativity and lack of communication.
• Likewise, the organization felt more confident in achieving yet another milestone on their path to employee satisfaction and building better values in their culture.

If you or anyone you know is suffering from grief, please have them meet with an experienced psychologist.

Sexual Minority is defined as a group whose orientation sexually, sexual identity or choices differ from the majority of the people. It differs from what is considered as a Normal sexual orientation in the society. It also includes transgenders, the third gender or intersex orientation.

The most important term here is Sexual Orientation.

What do you understand by sexual orientation?

Sexual orientation refers to a consistent pattern of romantic, emotional and/or sexual attraction to a particular gender or both genders. This orientation is a major source of a person’s sense of self and identity. Research shows that it can range anywhere from being attracted only to the opposite gender to exclusive attraction to the same gender.

• Three categories of Sexual Orientation are:
• Heterosexual i.e, having romantic, emotional and sexual attractions to the opposite sex;
• Gay/Lesbian i.e, having romantic, emotional, and sexual attractions to the same sex; and
• Bisexual i.e, having romantic, emotional and sexual attractions towards both the genders.

Sexual orientation has nothing to do with biological components of sex and gender or the genetic predispositions associated with being a man or a woman. It is also different from the gender identity and social gender roles. It is not only an individualistic characteristic like biological sex, age or gender identity. Sexual orientation can be expressed through simple behaviors like kissing, hugging or holding hands.

Psychological Issues Faced by the Not so Common Sexually Oriented

Homosexuality is not a mental disorder but the associated conditions of acceptance, social discrimination, bias and stress that comes along with it is a matter that disturbs the mental health of an individual. Typically a person’s sexual orientation emerges anywhere between middle childhood and early adolescence. These patterns of romantic, emotional and sexual choice may present itself without a sexual experience.

A person can be celibate and still know what his sexual orientation and choices are. What people experience regarding their sexual orientation is entirely different for each individual. Some people know that they are lesbian, bisexual or gay long before they actually get into a relationship with other people. Some engage in sexual activity with the similar sex or different sex partners before they are able to assign a clear label to their sexual orientation.

Claiming the sexual identity may be difficult for many people as it is often a very slow process.

How can Therapy Help?

Mental health is often a matter of concern among the LGBT people owing to the huge discrimination and bullying faced by them.  The most difficult thing for these people is to “Come out”. It includes self-awareness of their sexual attractions, disclosing to a few people, then disclosure to a large group or society and Lastly identifying oneself with the LGBT community. This coming out has the risk of prejudice and harsh discrimination associated with it. It is not easy to get over with so many issues at all levels alone.

Therapy also helps in

• Accepting your orientation sexually
• Coping with the reactions of people around you
• Getting over Gender dysphoria(Feeling that your body does not reflect your true gender)
• Transitioning from present to the desired gender state
• Low confidence and self-esteem
• Thoughts of self-harm or suicide
• Depression dues to long-term bullying
• Dealing with hostility and rejection from friends and family

Don’t suffer alone in silence.  Being more open about your choices and sexual orientation will buy you a better mental health.

If you are like most of the people who believe that being liked by someone comes from an untrainable, natural trait of a person. You are under a mistaken belief. To be likeable you do not need to be good looking, fiercely social, or exceptionally talented. It is a matter of High Emotional Intelligence.

In a recent study, subjects were asked to rate other people on their perceived traits of likeability. Surprisingly the majority of descriptors had nothing close to being attractive, gregarious or intelligent. Although some of them were related to sincerity, empathy and transparency.

These people have the skills of the social side of EQ. Apart from being likeable, they are also outperformers by a large margin. Alternatively, your being likeable at work can alter your performance.

Let us uncover some of the crucial behaviours that hold most of the people back from being likeable. Try to decrease the behaviours that make you unlikeable by magnifying the behaviours that do the opposite:

Emotional Hijacking

If you are often throwing tantrums, getting into arguments, screaming or throwing things out of anger; you lack control. You have to control your emotions depending on the situation. Exploding at someone without assessing how much they deserve it will picture you are unapproachable and intimidating. Take the driver’s seat by controlling what you feel by responding rather than reacting.

Dropping Names

It is great if you know people who are important or interesting but name dropping in every conversation us silly and pretentious. Just like Humble-bragging; people can often see through your intentions. You do not have to connect everything with who you know just to get attention. Be considerate, friendly and concise in conversations. Do not try to prove how important you are at the drop of A hat. Right attitude attracts more people than knowing someone important.

Bringing out your phone

Stop whipping out your phone in the mid of every conversation. Even a quick look or a text message turns people off. During a conversation, focus all your attention and energy on the ongoing conversation. Conversations will be more meaningful and enjoyable when you are completely in the moment.

Humble-bragging

Humblebragging is a kind of self-appraisal under the mask of self –deprecation. For example, the boy who often makes fun of himself for being a nerd; who actually wants to be appreciated for being a smart guy. Self-deprecation does not mask your bragging because people can see through it clearly. It is more frustrating because it is also an attempt to deceive.

Keeping your mind closed

Keep your mind open, to ideas as well as to people. It will make you more interesting and approachable. Do not be judgemental about everything around you. Sometimes, you really have to watch situations and the world through the eyes of the other person. You do not have to believe what they believe in or agree with whatever they say, but it simply means to quit forming opinions and just understanding their point of view.

Being very serious

Passionate people are often viewed as being too serious or un-participating because they are absorbed in their work. Hence, try to balance your work with having fun. Do not miss on valuable social moments at the workplace. Also, try to remember things that are important to people around you to make them understand how important they are to you.

Gossiping

Do not get carried away by office gossips. It makes you look terrible! So, commenting or making remarks at someone else’s misfortunes or misdeeds would hurt their feelings if the gossip ever finds its way to them. Likewise, gossiping makes you look extremely spiteful and negative, every time you indulge in it.

Summing it all up, it is important that you build your awareness around how your actions can be viewed by people around you. This will pave your way to being more likeable and strip off all negativity around you.

Also, Read our Blog on Low Emotional Intelligence.

You can either change according to needs of your immediate environment or die an early death.

This is as true to human life cycle as to the organizational life cycle. Organizations have to manage change strategically to implement new programs, initiatives or processes. One important part of the change management strategy should be “People Management”; failing which an organization’s initiatives may crumble down.

Communicate the Need for Change throughout the organization and encourage the participation of people to welcome the change rather than flooding them with sudden changes.

Here are some of the things that managers/supervisors/Change leaders should keep in Mind to make the process smooth and productive:

Change Management should start from the Bottom

Roll out all change management programs at the bottom level of the organization. Encourage learning and lots of knowledge sharing at this level by bottom-up and also top-down communication. This level is most affected by the implementation of changes, hence involve them in the decision making regarding strategy implementation.

Float a compelling story about the change

Tell an inspiring story that will motivate your employees about the problem. People will not buy your idea of change whatsoever if you do not make them understand and accept that there is a problem that has to be addressed. Workshops are a good idea when it comes selling your ideas, approaches policies, methods to your employees. Employee participation is crucial to change management.

Do it with them, not to them.

Keep away from ideas like “Changing employee mindsets”

Do not try to change employee mindsets.Doing this will imply that the organization is forcing change on them. It will also indicate people to believe that the organization thinks of the present mindset of people to be “Flawed” or “Wrong” in some way.

Take input from employees and do not mandate change.

You should explain all new policies, structures, targets, acquisitions at the early stages; It is useful for getting people participation and validation.Make involvement early and open.

Empower not Impose change

Any change process will go smoothly when you empower people to dig out solutions and responses. Managers should facilitate and support while leaders need to be tolerant and compassionate. Management styles and leadership strategies are more vital than clever processes and policies.

When employees trust their organization to risk their future to any change in the organization, only then can any meaningful organizational change can occur.

Also read our Blog on Issues Faced by a team at Workplace.

Mentriq by Dr. Prerna Kohli is India’s top Mental Health Counseling Provider. To learn more about Mentriq click here  http://mentriq.in/about-mental-health-services/

Balancing your life with a new member of the family is tough. Newborns need constant care and attention. When you are in a Job that demands a lot of your time, and energy, it can get even tougher. Maternity leaves are not long enough to help you recuperate and enjoy motherhood. A child needs care until the time he has grown up to be at least a teenager; which can range from 12- 18 years of age depending on each individual.

Although, Parenting is a responsibility of both the father and the mother, yet mothers take up the responsibility solely on themselves quite often. Paternity leave is still quite rare.

More women are in the workforce today than that has ever been. The total woman workforce has increased to 16.2 % from 13.4 % in 1980’s in Urban areas with fixed salaries.

They suffer from excessive guilt if they are not able to take care of their child and suffer a loss of self-esteem when they leave work to become a full-time mother.This situation is crucial for working moms and often leads them to a cycle of depression.

Here are some tips and tricks on how  to flourish in life for women who have taken up motherhood without compromising on a full-time career:

Get away with the feelings of Guilt

Do not dwell on the thoughts of not being able to spend time and care more for your child, instead focus on the good that you are doing for the family by bringing in additional income. You can put your child to the desired hobby classes and save for their college degrees with extra income that you bring home. Accept the good and the bad days and take the support of friends, support groups or a therapist to get over your feelings of excessive guilt.

Take time to choose quality childcare

Nannies, daycares and babysitters can provide you with a lot of support during this troubling time of growing a child. Create a list of criteria that are essential for your baby before shortlisting on the kind of daycare that your baby needs. look out for nannies who have a history of long-term commitments which would mean that they are adaptable to various age groups and would save you the trouble of onboarding and offboarding.

Start the Morning on a relaxed note

Do all the preparation in the night for the next day like packing tiffin, shortlisting the outfit, arranging your bags (for both yourself and your baby) etc. This will make your morning easy, relaxed and productive. Make time to exercise or do outdoor activities together instead.

Organise the entire week on the weekends

Use a calendar that is easily accessible to you, your children and the helpers around the children. Plan activities with your kids after your work like playdates with their friends, visit the zoo etc. Accompany them in these activities at least twice a week. Ask the nanny to look into the calendar and plan and get the kids ready according to the plan of the particular day.

Talk with your employer

Let the HR manager and your boss know your needs if you are already employed. Ask for the flexibility that you need and assuring on the productivity. If you are joining a new Job after a baby, research on whether other employees are given flexibility so that you can negotiate.

Stay connected

With technological advancements, it is not difficult to be connected to people all around the world. TAKE ADVANTAGE! Use Skype, WhatsApp or other video call platforms to stay connected to your child when he is doing something important or when he is cranky. Hearing your voice and seeing your face will give him assurance that you are within reach always.

Take care of yourself

Most of your time is taken up by your family or work. It is important to pamper yourself by taking out your “ME-TIME” every day out of your hectic schedule. Soak into a book, have a cup of coffee, do meditation or yoga. Take an appointment to a spa or salon once in 15 days. Meet your friends or plan for a movie without kids with your partner.

You are going to be the role model for your little munchkins who grow up to be responsible humans one day. It is not only you but also your relationship with your partner and work that matters to these little people watching you and making meaning out of every action you do. You cannot do it if you are Cranky, sad, cribbing or depressed and this is possible only when you prioritize your needs apart from others around you.

Also, read our Blog on POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION.

In a very stereotypical matter, it’s only men who are seen as sex addicts. Whenever someone says sex addiction, they instantly think it is a man. But, sex addiction is not only limited to men but can also happen to women. Being a sex addict is a serious mental illness, and it requires effective and immediate treatment.

As any other illness, sex addiction also doesn’t discriminate between man or woman. Anyone can become addicted to sexual behaviour, or any other kind of addiction. As mentioned in our previous posts, sex addiction is a compulsive behaviour, where the person is no longer interested in the pleasures of the activity.

But, there is a difference between sexually addicted men and women.

Thus, below are few Signs of Sex Addiction in Women:

Addiction to Love or Relationship:

Women who are suffering from sexual addiction are constantly looking for new love and relationships. But, these relationships are not from a need of having a relationship but they are out of compulsion.

Other Addiction:

Often women who are suffering from sexual addiction will also have other kinds of addiction along with this. This may include, nicotine addiction, alcohol addiction, shopping addiction etc.

Masking Feelings:

Women who are addicts often don’t indulge in their feelings. Whenever they feel anxious, depressed, stressed, bored or discomfort they resort to sex or sexual pleasures as their escape.

Negative Feelings After:

Every time after they have had sex, feelings of guilt or shame will take over. Sometimes, after sex, they will start feeling immense sadness which often leads to depression.

Needs for Arousal:

There are a certain want and need which meets their fantasy for arousal. Thus, these needs or fantasy can be of seductive roleplaying or involvement of pain etc. If these specific needs are not present in sexual activity, there is no level of arousal.

Excessive Porn:

Women suffering from sex addiction have an excessive reliance on pornography. They try to find and fulfil their fantasies through the pornographic material. Also, they try to enact the same situations they see in pornography and try and bring it to their bedroom.

Masturbation:

There is a certain compulsion to masturbate among women who are suffering from sexual addiction. They will constantly find places to masturbate which becomes a compulsive act.

Interference with Work-Life:

Pre-occupation with sex and sexual behaviour starts interfering with their daily life and routine. Often, they will find different places to have sex or masturbation, which include their workplace, house, restaurant, etc. Hence, affecting their work-life and creating a hindrance or even massive dire consequences.

Dependent Relationship:

Since women suffering from sexual addiction often find partners who are addicts themselves. Thus, they will form a co-dependent relationship with those partners, and their addiction to justify them.

Sexual Addiction in women has always been a taboo topic. But, it is as common in women as men. According to survey around 8% of men suffer from sexual addiction and about 5% of women suffer from sexual addiction. Hence, if you or someone you know is suffering from this mental illness, then please visit a mental health professional immediately.

To take our test on Sex Addiction Click here

Read our Previous Blog on Signs of Sexual Addiction in Men.

Worried about What to Choose? Which Career is right for you and Which is Not?

After finishing class XIIth examination or Bachelor’s, the basic question any student asks themselves is, what career they should choose. There are thousands of options in the industry, and among those thousands, there are over lakh people asking you to select different careers. Among this peer pressure, and uncertainty, you are not able to decide the right career path for yourself.

Thus, below are few steps in choosing the right career for you:

Self-Assessment:

The first and the foremost step is to do a self-assessment. You should be able to know your strengths and weaknesses. Also, What is your personality type, and the combination with your soft-skills, values etc. Considering these will help you to chose the right career for you.

Make a List:

After the self-assessment, there will be a list in front of you, with different career choices. The best way to move forward is to start comparing the lists. If you have taken the personality test and the career test, there will be different and similar options. Thus, you can combine the lists, and find the similar options based on the tests. Then, once you have a master list, you can select one specific career option from that. Along with it, you can add possible interests you think you are attracted to.

Explore the Options:

The next step is to explore the options on your list. Once you have narrowed down the career choices, you can look at different job descriptions and education and licensure requirements. Thus, after selection, you can look at different perspectives and understand different sectors pertaining to the choice of your career.

Short List:

After you have explored different options thoroughly, you can start shortlisting the career path you have most interested in. You can do so by removing the options which you don’t like, or you are not ready to follow the education path or you see there is no growth perspective. After this, you will be left with a very few options.

Do Ground Research:

Next step is to enter the ground and do some ground research. Once you have narrowed down your choices, you can contact people who are already doing the same type of job. You can try and schedule an informative session with them, where they can guide you and help you understand the pros and cons of the job. Arranging interviews with them will help you understand the occupational choice you have narrowed down.

Make the Choice:

Lastly, you are ready to select one career pertaining to your interest and research you have done. Thus, you can pick the career where you think will bring you the most joy.

It is important to remember, the decision you make can be changed at any point in your life. There are many people who change their careers at a very late age. Also, once you have decided on what career you want to select, it is important that you start setting long-term and short-term goals. Where you are able to select the education or experience requirements. You can do this by writing plans and steps you need to take to pursue the career of your choice.

Click Here to Take our Personality Test to know about your Personality.

Click Here to Take our Career-Inventory Test.

Mentriq by Dr. Prerna Kohli is India’s top Mental Health Counseling Provider. To learn more about Mentriq click here.

Your relationships at home and at the workplace are as good as the Quality of your communication. We are all guilty of Overcommunicating or Undercommunicating ate different situations but seldom the right communication. Our own biases and those of others we are communicating with paralyze, our effective communication.The word communication comes from the Latin word “Communis”, which means “to share”. Communication Includes Verbal, Non-Verbal And all kinds of electronic means of communication. It is an act of conveying the information that you have to the other person to reach a position of “Shared  Understanding”.

There are three important elements in Communication: The  Sender, The Receiver and the medium of communication. The sender converts his thoughts or information that he wants to share in a form understandable by the receiver. This is referred to as encoding(The sender’s interpretation). The message is then sent through a medium whether face to face, electronically or written. The receiver translates the information based on his own understanding which is referred to as decoding(The sender’s interpretation).

WORKPLACE COMMUNICATION

Workplace communication is very vital to your organization’s effectiveness, productivity as well as employee morale. It is also one of the major components to increase the job satisfaction of the employees. Research has shown that effective Upward(with seniors), Downward(with juniors), and Lateral (With colleagues) communication has shown improvement in overall productivity of the company. Every process in the organization flows and thrives on communication and hence it is essential to keep the channels smooth and free-flowing.

Here are a few effective strategies for Communication in the workplace:

Create an Open Communicative environment

As an organization, your main idea to foster better productivity must be to develop a communicative atmosphere where all employees are free to share their opinions, feedback, demands and even criticism about a specific issue without any hesitation. Sharing opinions aids in neutralizing the negative effects of any grudges and resentments that might have accumulated over time.

Make communication Inclusive

Inclusive communication is when all members are made a part when a decision is to be taken by the company. Decisions that are part of day to day work of the company. With this strategy, you make the environment more creative and as well as encourage participation.

Make the communication of the firm Two-way

Communication is a two-way process whether vertically or horizontally. It can never be a One-way process. Employees should be provided channels to communicate with their Senior authorities as well as members at the lower levels.

Make the interaction process result-oriented

All organizational communication should be result oriented and focus on reaching the desired outcomes.

Employ multiple channels to communicate

To ensure that every member of the organization receive the message that you send, channel it through multiple mediums. Some of the mediums used for effective communication are one to one conversation, meetings, posts, memo, emails, fax etc.

Listen

Listening is a very important component of Communication. It is specifically important in one to one communication. Both the employer and the employed must practice active listening. If you are not much of a listener, keep a track on your watch and decide to just listen for a designated number of minutes. Training yourself in such a way will make you an excellent listener with time.

Make vital information available for reference anytime

It is quite likely that an individual was not present when an important presentation had taken place. For such situations make sure all the information is available through emails or messages.

Re-check the communication process regularly

As an Organization, you should always cross check that your communication process is still efficient in the present scenario. Just implementing a strategy is not enough; It is also important to examine the strategy so that it is lucrative to the company.

There is a probability that after implementing all the strategies too, there is a communication problem or conflict within the organization. It is important to deal with such impending issues wisely and Intelligently.

Also, read our Blog on Emotional Intelligence

A lot of Researches on smokers have clearly indicated it as a bad habit that had started in the teenage years and then became an Addiction. What is the difference between a habit and an addiction then?

A habit is formed by frequently repeating an act over and over again, to reach a point where the brain does it automatically in an autopilot mode. Alternatively, an addiction is a compulsive need for a certain thing or substance, which when deprived causes a host of other problems. Moreover, a bad habit can be modified or controlled with some effort but addiction often requires professional help.

What is cigarette addiction?

If you are addicted to cigarettes, you primarily are dependent on a substance called Nicotine. This is a natural insecticide. It is found in Tobacco plants and is three times more lethal than arsenic and strychnine (toxins) in animal studies. This natural insecticide is so similar to the neurotransmitters in the brain that it can control the flow of more than 200 neurochemicals and the major being DOPAMINE.

What does Dopamine do?

Dopamine is that Chemical which everyone seems to be very fond of! Dopamine is released in Love, In Lust, Motivation, Attention, Feminism, and all kinds of ADDICTION. Without Dopamine, we could be quite UN-HUMAN. The reason we seek acceptance, desire companionship, get anxious due to boredom or a sense of achievement due to task completion is all due to Dopamine.

When you smoke, the brain makes an image of how your want was satisfied the last time you smoke and hence linking this sensation to feeling good to influence future behaviour.

 SMOKING…

along with dopamine release, nicotine also stimulates the central nervous system which results in the smoker experiencing a stimulated high. This alertness they feel makes smokers feel superior to other kinds of addicts. But, the problem with this high is that after a few minutes when the dopamine level starts to fall, there is a sudden dip;  the craving kicks in all over again. The addict then falsely believes that the drug is as important as their survival. It has helped them cope with difficulties and complexities in life.

Drug addiction damages the ability to control Impulses, rational thinking and judgement. That is the reason suggesting or asking a smoker to quit smoking is like; “The brakes of your car don’t function,” and someone says; “You should have stopped your car at the red light instead of jumping it”.

More often than not, smoking often defines who they are for a smoker, helps them in coping. Quitting cigarettes means the start of a horrible life, endless suffering and deprivation for the rest of their lives.

What makes it more difficult to quit smoking is;

• The withdrawal symptoms that the person experiences, in the form of low nicotine levels. These are real physical changes and not imagined (Major reason for relapse rates in smokers within a few hours).
• The high availability of cigarettes and easy usage along with less stigma in comparison to other drugs.
• Cost efficiency; You do not have to be rich to smoke even the most reputed brands available all over the world.
• It does not hamper your day to day functioning unless you have a Tobacco Addiction disorder; making you believe falsely and underestimating the ill effects in the near future.

Smoking Causes…

More deaths every year than HIV, Drug Use, Alchohol Abuse, and Motor Vehicle-related Injuries.

from,

• Cardiovascular and associated coronary heart disease
• Respiratory, lung bronchitis and breathing associated diseases
• Cancer in almost any part of the body

In women, it could cause additional problems during Pregnancy and childbirth like pre-term delivery, stillbirth, low birth weight, ectopic pregnancy etc.

Mere Will-power is not going to help with your addiction to cigarettes. Smoking often is a result of underlying Stress and Anxiety. Please feel free to take our test for Anxiety.

Please Seek professional help!

What made those men into despicable animals in the Nirbahya case on December 16th, 2012 on the roads of our capital or 8-year old Asifa’s rape in Kathua in Kashmir?

Someone like them, or not so like them may be present in the workplace, or in our surroundings. But, there is an underline process within their thinking which is similar for all of them.

The psychopathology of a sexual predator stems from their thinking and childhood experiences. Not many times the names of the sexual predator will be on the news or TV channels. The presence of sexual predators is in the office itself, where they can find a lot of opportunities for consensual sex. But, the experience of sexual activity is just to have a shallow sexual encounter. The “excitement” for them is derived from the feeling of “control”.

The most common trait between a psychopath and a sexual predator is their idea of control and dominance. They cherish the idea of control and while they indulge in sexual predation, the consideration of the other doesn’t matter. They are attacking or having sex just because they want to control the other. Hence, the chase becomes an “exciting” activity for them. Also, there is a conscious uncontrollable belief within them that they are irresistible and anyone they select will like them. Many times, this belief is reinforced by how they act or present themselves. A certain level of narcissistic effect takes place.

For a sexual predator, sex is always on their mind. It is not their addiction but their want, hence they will be in constant lookout for their “prey”. This lookout is not gendered specific, but on an unconscious level, it is experience specific. Thus, according to their processing and challenge level, they try and seek out place and person. This person can be a woman, a man, a teenage girl/boy, or even a child. Thus, creating a pattern of excitement and dominance for them.

Their unconscious fantasy is to achieve a situation where they are the one who is creating a dominance. They will look for the perfect opportunity to create this situation. Going back to it again, sex will not have a meaning for them. Even in the situation of rape, the person will not have to do anything with the needs or sex, but the excitement of dominance and owning the other as a property. Sexual predator’s sex life with their girlfriend or wife or husband or boyfriend is not affected because their sexual needs are still fulfilled through them. But, while they are approaching someone they have selected, they will only look at the level of dominance they can conquer the other person.

Their psychological functions depend on four aspects:

Power and Control:

As said earlier, power and control are the most important factor for them. The self-image of the person is to dominate others. They proceed to do this when they are pursuing whomsoever they find attractive.

Uniqueness:

They consider themselves to be the unique person sexually. They feel that they are irresistible. Thus, being able to satisfy every need of the other person. Hence, the right and wrong for them are made by them and their own rules.

Deception:

Mostly, they are extremely intelligent hence, they are able to lie very cleverly. Along with lies, they are highly deceptive. They will and can become something the other person wants them to be. Thus, even their close ones aren’t able to look through their deceit. This behaviour further adds to their narcissistic self.

A sense of Invincibility:

They have this belief that they are invincible. They are able to easily shut off the sense of consequences. Thus, considering themselves as untouchable and invincible. Hence, when they are actually caught, they don’t feel any remorse for their actions but they feel that how can they be caught. Thus, feeling that they are the victims. The sense of empathy becomes nil for them.

The issue of sexual predators is still on a rise, be it in the workplace or outside the workplace. There are different laws which are coming up to punish them. But, these laws will not affect them because they would still believe they are invincible. Hence, it is our duty to be on a lookout for them. These people are suffering from a mental health issue. Thus, it is important to report them.

Mentriq by Dr. Prerna Kohli is India’s top Mental Health Counseling Provider. To learn more about Mentriq click here  http://mentriq.in/about-mental-health-services/