Blog

Our Mind is an amazing, complicated and mysterious thing.This is the machine generating ideas, thoughts, and plans.Your mind is working hard to keep your world in place; But to make this process sustainable you have to take in more than you are giving out every time. You need to refuel your life from time to time so that you do not run out of fuel.

Challenges will come your way on a daily basis. Trivial things like taking care of a newborn, dealing with a bad boss, change of location to serious ones like toxic family members, addicted parents, disturbed marriage etc.You should be very protective of your mind and make it a priority above everything else. Mental and emotional wellbeing will take you a long way in achieving your life goals and having a satisfactory life.

Help is near….

Your mental wellbeing and personal development will have a drastic effect on the business side of your life.Sometimes it becomes hard to recognize for yourself that there are things that limit you from achieving full potential.Fear, Insecurity, Self-doubt, Self-criticism, Low confidence, negative thoughts are so ingrained in your personality and attitude that it will take a lot of effort to get yourself rid of it. You must have had some bad experiences in the past, or bullying in childhood that you could never let go. These scars remain throughout your life and cause distress without us even being aware of. The good news is you can overcome these! You do not have to be totally dysfunctional or out of work to talk to a therapist. Preventive therapy can help you at an earlier stage when your world has still not fallen apart but you are a little discomforted.

Role of Therapy

It is easy to talk to an unknown person than your relative or close friend.During the talk, a trained counselor or therapist will listen to you and will help you to find your own answers without judgment.

The work of the therapist is not to give you answers but lead you to answers with support. A therapist will give you time to express all kinds of emotions.You can be angry, shout, cry or think without interruption.

There are many different types of therapy but the aim is same; it helps you feel better and cope with problems more effectively.

Feelings of enjoyment, contentment, engagement, and confidence with the world are all a part of mental wellbeing. You can do things that you want to and keep relations that bring joy to you and also people around you.

If I tell you to practice one thing that requires just 10 seconds of your day to become richer, lower your stress and increase your metabolism. Would you believe? Take this away then; Sleeping without clothes can do all this for you. The only effort you need to make is to strip-off your clothes before you jump into the bed.

Only 8% of the people sleep naked. This may sound unreal but have patience till you get to the end of the article.

You get better sleep

When you sleep, your brain is actively removing toxic proteins from the neurons that are accumulated throughout the day. The toxins are removed adequately only when you get quality sleep. If the toxic proteins are not removed, your ability to think is impaired.

Reduces stress

Prolonged stress damages your immunity by producing excess cortisol in your body. It increases your risk of heart disease, depression, anxiety, obesity etc. Proper sleep helps restore the cortisol levels. Sleeping naked decreases the temperature of the body. When the body is cooler, you wake up less and the quality of sleep becomes better.

Sleeping naked makes you healthy

When the body temperature is lower, the metabolism revs up due to the production of more brown fat. Brown fat is produced to keep you warm. It produces heat and burns more calories. Helps you in losing weight. Better sleep will improve your blood circulation, produce growth hormones and melatonin which are also known to produce anti-ageing effects.

It builds your confidence

Confidence is a key component in deciding your success. It moves you to try new ventures, muster challenges and build perseverance in the face of difficulties. If you are confident you earn more and get promoted more often than your counterparts. Sleeping without clothes makes you comfortable in your body and increases your self-esteem.

Who is the most important person in your life? Your spouse, parents, children or a friend. If you reflect on this question, you will identify that it is your boss.

You spend 50 percent of your productive time daily with your boss.If this significant relationship is under stress. Other relations also suffer.

Difficult bosses contaminate your life and your workplace. Some of the bosses have no idea what harm they are doing and some do it in a carefully planned manner. In movies, the bad boss is a comic role but in real life; there is no comedy about it.

These people create stress that impairs your work and decreases productivity.Many studies have found having a bad boss increases your chances of having a heart attack by almost 60%.

The best option to avoid a bad boss is to search for another employment.But this is not always possible.You have to learn to neutralize the bad effects caused by this person. Identify the kind of boss you have to solve tackle them intelligently.

The Tyrant

This person uses Machiavellian tactics and makes decisions that can feed his pride.He has an uncontrollable need for power and uses intimidation to make others work for him.

The Micromanager

This person will make you feel that you are under constant surveillance.They give attention to the finest details, which makes you feel discouraged, frustrated and very uncomfortable.

The Incompetent

This person was made the boss by the result of a hasty promotion or haphazard hiring.The person lacks the capabilities for the position that he holds.The people who report to them are much more skilled than him.

The not appropriate buddy

This person is too friendly but not in a happy way.He does not know teambuilding and engages in gossip.He uses favoritism to build teams. Causes frustration among employees.He is bad at making tough decisions.

The Robot

This person just looks at numbers to decide who is valuable to the company and who is not.He has all calculations in mind regarding the productivity of each employee.He put a lot of pressure on you to perform.

The Seagull

These bosses interact with their subordinates when there is an emergency.They bring a storm; pile up with formulaic advice and then leave.They never think about their approach.

The visionary

The strength of this person lies in bringing new ideas and innovation. They cannot concentrate on one task that is at hand.By the time you come to execute the idea; the boss has taken off on another idea.You need to figure things out on your own.

Identifying the problem is fifty percent of the solution.Once identified, a solution can be reached faster.

A cognitive bias is an error in reasoning, evaluation, and memory.  It is a systematic malfunction in the process of thinking. You remember an event based on the way your memory functions, which often lead to biased thoughts and decision making. Some cognitive biases are related to problems in attending to details. You have to be really selective in what you pay attention to Since it is a limited resource. This often leads subtle biases to creep in, influencing how you see and think about the world.

Cognitive bias occurs when you hold onto your preferences and beliefs regardless of contradictory information.

How do these biases work?

A brain is a powerful machine but it is also subject to limitations. Cognitive biases make the complex work of brain simple by processing the information in speed. Hence, they aid us in making quicker decisions and reach conclusions faster. While making decisions or judgments about your world, you try to be objective, think logical and evaluate all information that is available to you. But, these biases often lead to poor decisions.

Some of them are discussed below to keep you out of the trap in future:

The Bandwagon Effect.

This is the tendency to follow what other people are doing. People stop exploring various options and go with the idea that is first put on the table. Doing what everyone is doing makes us feel good, even if they are bad alternatives.

 Planning Fallacy.

The tendency of thinking that we can do things quicker than we can actually. This leads to procrastination and incomplete work.

The ostrich effect.

This is exactly what the name means. You hide your face in the ground (not literally) when faced with a scary situation rather than facing it head-on. When you receive a negative reaction in relations or at work, you just push the problems away.

Confirmation bias.

It is very common. It’s the tendency to seek information which can support our already existing beliefs. What happens here is you first form opinions and seek evidence later. Whereas the case should be that we base all our opinions on facts.

Attribution error.

This is when you attribute a situational behavior of a person to his personality. There could be various other reasons for a person’s poor work performance but the most commonly attributed factor is often “laziness”.

Conservatism bias.

What happens here is that already existing information takes priority over new information. Do not reject an idea quickly just because it is different than your beliefs or are radical.

Lastly, when you start feeling that you have mastery over biases, you are in all probability experiencing blind spot bias. When you start to find biases in others and not in yourself; it’s blind spot bias.

Recognition of biases is invaluable as it enables us to think objectively and makes the communication effective.

Technology has made our lives easier, and one of the best inventions of technology has been the cellular phone. It is an indispensable part of our life now. They entertain you, connects you, informs you and aids in exploring your passions. Smartphones are our daily bread now!

Phones should help make your lives easier and not become the center of your life. A recent research found out that for smartphone users a majority of their problematic behaviors are responses that are mindless and for some, it is a bad habit that they need to overcome. Environmental control, behavioral nudges and mindfulness help in breaking this habit.

Important Findings of the Study were:

Importance of Phone: One-third of the participants give priority to their phones rather than the people they care about and wish to spend time with.

Factors of Generation: More intense issues were among the young people. Gen Z described their best friend to be their smartphone.

People seek Help: Participants want someone to help them with Phone-life balance. More than 60 percent of the respondents want to get the maximum out of their phone time and also from their life out of the phone.

They want to separate: Majority participants said it is necessary to have a separate life from phones.
Problematic areas in which smartphone impact our life and connection to others. Younger generations are more likely to fall into the trap of these behaviors.

Checking compulsively: People say they feel compelled to check their phones constantly and they do not want to do this.

High phone time: People spend a lot of their quality time checking phones and would be more happy lessening that.
Dependent on phone emotionally: People depend on their phones for a lot more than they should and panic when they are not using the phone. They are always thinking about the phone even when not using it.

What to do?

Stop answering all calls: Do not reach for the phone whenever it rings. Go back to the good old behaviors; use an alarm clock instead of using the alarm on your phone. This will prevent you from checking the notifications before going to bed.

Select your notifications and alerts: You do not need notifications for all the Instagram posts and alerts for the latest online festival on the shopping app.

Use a phone tracking app: Use your phone to control your cravings. Try to understand your emotional triggers for using the phone. Use the notification blocker, screen dimming tools; compete in your circle of close people to discourage phone usage.

The greatest problem with all kind of addiction is to lose control. If all the above measures do not give the desired outcome, meet a therapist to get the phone-life balance back.

A recent poll for Human Resource Management found that “Burnout from the current job” was the top reason for people to quit their job. Burnout can make your life tough, even when you are passionate about your work.

If you are unable to create a balance in life by an alignment of input and output; you will have burnout. When you perceive that you are giving more to your job than you’re receiving out of the job you burn out. The important factor here is not that the job is not rewarding but often because you are not taking care of yourself.

How do you fight it?

• Disconnect:  Do not be available 24/7; it will reduce your exposure to constant stressors and help you refocus and recharge. This is the most important strategy for burnout because if you do not disconnect yourself electronically you will always be working. Do not spend the entire weekend answering emails or voicemails instead keep a designated time. Schedule short blocks of time which alleviate stress without you having to sacrifice your availability.
• Schedule your relaxation: Plan your relaxation like you plan your work. Read a book for half an hour or bicycle. If you schedule your relaxation activities, it is more certain that they happen and you have something that you look forward to also.
• Understand the signals of your body: If you pay attention to your body, you will understand the signals. This can help you diagnose burnout in the early stages. All stomach ache is not a result of something bad that you ate. Similarly, an aching neck is not always an indicator of sleeping wrong but the accumulation of stress over time.
• Organize yourself: most of the pressure that you experience is not due to overwork but because you are disorganized in handling the schedule. Organize yourself better to beat burnout.
• Strengthen your support system: You would be tempted to withdraw from other people when you are stressed. But it should be the other way round. Family and friends are capable of supporting you. Spend some time with your loved ones and remove yourself from the stressors at work and have a little fun.

If the above strategies do not work, then the problem is with the job and you might contemplate changing it or visit a Therapist who can help you find out the root of the problem.

Change is inevitable but not avoidable. A major life change is often accompanied by feelings of sadness, dissatisfaction, dullness and eventually depression.These life changes are dramatic, unexpected, brings us out of our comfort zones; give us a sense of an uncertain future.

What is a major life change?

A change in anything that affects your life or lifestyle significantly. It might be a positive one that was already planned or a negative one with adverse effects on your life. It can also be totally unexpected. Others may not be able to comprehend it but it would be significant for you.

For example,

-A loss of job suddenly.

-Relocating to a different state or out of the country.

-Closing a long-term relationship.

-Death of a loved one.

-Diagnosis of a terminal illness

-Losing mobility due to an accident or injury

What is depression?

Depression is not just feeling sad, or a bit down after experiencing a new situation. Depression affects the core of your being and makes you lifeless, and unable to enjoy the good things that you used to enjoy earlier.

Why does life changes cause depression?

Contrary to the common belief, that negative people suffer from depression, people who are positive and optimistic to live also suffer from depression. The life changes listed above have a profound effect on your way of living and being. Such changes will also cause sadness, anxiety, fear and even aggression. Some of us can adjust to the changes accordingly but for a few others, the changes may be too difficult to handle. Even if you have support from family and friends, you can suffer from depression.

How can you get help?

Speak with a counselor or a psychologist who can help you with the understanding of your depressive pattern; identify the cause behind it. Therapy helps with coping major life changes better.He/She is also an excellent support; at times when your world feels like it has fallen apart or is changing rapidly.

Social Anxiety is not just exaggerated fear of meeting strangers depending on circumstances and it will not go away just by facing your fears. “It is the intense fear of being judged, and negative evaluation by others that leads to a sense of inadequacy, inferiority, embarrassment, self-consciousness, humiliation and later leads to depression.”

This person will be functioning absolutely well when alone whereas becomes anxious in the presence of others.

‘Social anxiety’ is not the same thing as Shyness’; They are different. Shyness is a personality trait whereas Social anxiety is a disorder that makes people dysfunctional. Shyness is not always a prerequisite to social anxiety disorder though you will find a lot of people with social anxiety disorder to be shy.

Signs of Social Anxiety:-

-Significant Emotional distress in situations ;

-When introduced to unknown people

-If criticized or teased

-When the person becomes the center of attraction

-Meeting people of authority or important people

-Fear of being in interpersonal relationships including friendships

The physiological signs include intense fear, heart racing, turns red or blushes, sweating excessively, Throat and mouth dry out, trembling, difficulty swallowing, muscle spasms generally around face and neck.Do not confuse Social anxiety with depression, bipolar, panic disorder, schizophrenia, ADHD, Asperger’s Syndrome etc. Since It has an important component of continuous and extreme anxiety which does not go away with time.

Therapy could help you with the management of Social anxiety. Progressive deficits happen in the amount of fear, and anxiety experienced. Hence, You need huge amounts of persistence and consistency with therapy. A therapy programme in this will provide necessary tricks and specific plan. It also specifies in detail how and why the sufferer should begin to accept their rational thought, emotions, perceptions, and beliefs.

Mental or emotional and psychological abuse has a long-term effect on the victim. This type of abuse occurs generally in long-term relationships. Not only in romantic relationships but also in the parent-child relationship.It can also be in your relationship with the boss. One person puts the other person down psychologically. Children also suffer from mental abuse through maltreatment psychologically often by isolation and neglect.

This kind of abuse is more emotional than physical in nature. Thus, It can range from verbally abusing someone to daily criticism. It could be subtle like intimidating, manipulating and refusing to be pleased. The pattern of abuse includes being aggressive, denial and minimizing the ideas of the victim. Withholding, which includes refusing to listen, communicate and emotionally withdrawing oneself is also a form of mental abuse.

Emotional abuse is far more destructive than verbal and psychological abuse.

Signs that show that you are in an emotionally abusive relationship

• The person puts you down often and uses extreme criticism as a method of punishing.
• Embarrasses and humiliates you in public.
• Refuses to communicate or withdraws from conversing completely.
• The person makes mean jokes or fun of you.
• Is extremely moody, and gets angry easily
• The person uses sarcasm and uses unpleasant tone.
• Dominates and controls you by monitoring your actions.
• Controls the money and uses it to modify your actions
• Threats you to commit suicide or harm themselves if something is not done according to them.
• Makes all efforts to isolate you from friends and family.

If you are facing these things on a daily basis, it is time to regain control. Since Abusers treat you badly and also convince you that you are worthy of no more. Do not fall into this trap and seek help immediately. Mutual respect is very important in any relationship and does not compromise on that. Also Loving a person is one thing and being vulnerable is another.

Coming out of an abusive relationship requires you to seek professional help. It often results in a loss of self-esteem, confidence, Identity that takes a lot to rebuild. Hence, being in an abusive relationship will take a lot from you without you even realizing that it is too late now.

To schedule an appointment with our Counsellors, please call +91-9-069-069-069

Adolescence is a time of great turmoil. Adolescence is the age of 11 to 19 years roughly. Parents also have a tough time dealing with their teenagers. Adolescents are generally viewed by elders as disobedient; who do not follow rules and misbehave. On the contrary, adolescents are actually the ones suffering. A lot of change takes place in the body and mind of the teenager.

It is a stage of life in which the kid is still discovering himself. In this process, he loses his identity. It is the period of transition from being a child to becoming an adult.

Let us look at the two major changes in teenagers:

Physical changes:

Hormone levels are changing at this age drastically for both boys and girls. Due to changes in the hormones, their bodies change in gender-appropriate ways. This is a hard time to go through.

Emotional changes:

Teenagers are confused about their role in the family and society. They are treated as adults and kids alternatively according to situations; a decrease in confidence leads to heightened self-consciousness. Mood swings become common leading to a more emotional vulnerability in teenagers.

Due to these changes teenagers go through specific psychological problems:

Addiction

Substance abuse is very common in teenagers. It is often because of peer pressure and later on becomes a coping mechanism to deal with the emotional turbulence. Also, celebrities become their role models and whatever they do is an ideal way of doing things. Speaking to parents is difficult.

Depression

Depression is common in all age groups. It is more common in teenage as he has nobody to speak to about his feelings. The intense loss of self-identity and confusing role in the society makes it more difficult to cope on a daily basis. There are changes taking place rapidly but the supportive structure to deal is often unavailable.

Phobias

Since this is a growing phase. Learning is taking place at a rapid pace and new experiences are taking place all the time. Fear left untreated often turns into phobias.

Conduct Disorder

Symptoms are a persistent disruptive behavior in which the person violates the rights of others and social norms. In the beginning; it is more like disobeying rules and eventually becomes more disruptive.

There are much more like Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), Bipolar Disorder., Social Anxiety Disorder, Panic Disorder, and Schizophrenia; which can affect the teenager. All of them need immediate attention and hence need therapy.