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Some things Can permanently Change your Life! In the Fable, The Red Shoes, a very young girl dreams of a pair of pretty red shoes. There is a blind woman who loves her and cares for her. She tricks the blind woman into buying her these beautiful pairs. She loves these red shoes and gave more importance to them than other important immaterial things in her life and as it happens in Fables, karma is watching it all. The shoes get stuck in her feet permanently and she is forced to dance without stopping. She had to keep on dancing until she almost dies of starvation and exhaustion!

In real life, we often do the same. We follow the things that we think will make us happy oblivious to the dangerous path that it may lead us to.

A recent study found that people who experience satisfaction from their jobs are not the ones in fancy offices but the ones who approach their work as their calling. It could be the Job of a menial labor as well.

Take note of these few habits to have a more meaningful and fulfilling Life:

Stay away from Toxic People

Negative people will erode the quality of your life tremendously. These people will be very unhappy with you when you decide to stay away from them, nevertheless stay away! Avoiding their influence will be worth the cumulative effect of years they will have on you. Each time you find your blood boil out of anger towards a co-worker or family member who is toxic, remember someone who helps you in making your life more peaceful.

Do not use Phone, laptop or Tablet before sleeping

This habit harms your productivity and sleep in a big way. The blue light from these devices plays an important role in altering your energy level, mood and the quality of sleep. The morning sunlight contains huge proportions of this blue light which stops production of sleep-inducing melatonin and hence you feel alert. The concentration of this blue light reduces as the day progresses. Hence, you feel sleepy.

When you watch Netflix lying on your bed, this blue light is emitted right into your face which interferes with your ability to fall asleep. Try to avoid all kinds of devices after dinner. Television is okay if you sit far apart from the screen.

Be grateful of “Now”

If you want to be peaceful and happy, being grateful for whatever you have is a fundamental tool. Wealth, cars, glamour will not bring happiness. The happiness you get from owning something is Temporary, you will crave for more and more. If you cannot afford a Champagne and caviar, you can still enjoy a full meal. If you are not able to appreciate the life you already have, you will not be able to appreciate the “Great Life” that you aspire to get. “

Your life will be an endless wait to reach a destination which you will never arrive at.”

Things are not always like you think them to be

This thing goes hand in hand with appreciating the “Now”. Don’t compare your life to that person on Facebook who you believe has a perfect life. They might also be trying to deal with a lot in their personal and professional lives behind the doors. The perfection that you see could be a Mirage. A trouble you are currently facing in life might turn out to be a good thing in the long run. Hence, stop trying to be omniscient; you are not a fortune teller. Always be open to possibilities that life has in store for you.

Start, even though you might fail

Writers spend unlimited hours brainstorming and writing pages after pages about ideas, plots, and characters which they are aware that they would never include in the final book. Ideas need time to develop. You have to give your ideas some time because great ideas take time to evolve. Don’t try to b perfect!

Jodi Picoult said, “ You can edit a bad page, but you can’t edit a blank page.”

Organise Yourself

This is a very important tool for being productive. The common perspective is that there a scarcity of Ideas, whereas in reality, spare time is a scarce thing. You seldom have enough spare time and still, spend so much time not being organized. Stop touching things 3-4 times and tossing them from here to there. Have a physical space for all important things that you need to respond to whenever you get some time rather than scanning a stack of documents.

Do things that remind you of who you are

We aspire to that coveted new term that is around called ‘Me time”, But what is that “me time”? It is that time slot you reserve for yourself to do the things that you want to do most authentically. This is the time when you take off all your masks and just be yourself. Dance on the tune of your favorite numbers at top volume, go for a run with a close friend. These moments will rejuvenate you!

Be a “No Man”

Even if you have not watched the famous movie “Yes Man” it is not a big loss because you have to be a “No Man”. Research shows that if you fail to say No and are more prone to say Yes to all requests that are forwarded your way, you will experience more stress, burnout, and even depression. You will lose your self-control eventually. Say “No” when you have to instead of using phrases like “I don’t think so” or “ I am doubtful of” etc. If you say NO to a new commitment, you give honor to your existing commitments. Remind yourself to say NO so that you can increase your self-control and prevent the negative effects of Over-commitment.

Make realistic goals

Big, aspirational goals can be very inspiring until you realize that it is not practically possible. At this stage when you fall short of achieving these goals you are completely disappointed and guilty. It is good to set goals that push your limits and challenge your abilities as long as you are within the bounds of reality.

We are an accumulation of our daily habits hence, choose them carefully. Cultivate habits that take you in the right direction!

Also, read our blog on being CALM

This is a Circadian Rhythm related sleep disorder. Circadian Rhythm is also known as your sleep/wake cycle that is the 24 hours clock that works internally in your body. This rhythm is cycling between your sleepiness and alertness at regular intervals.

A shift work sleep disorder is associated with insomnia, excessive sleepiness and affects people who work hours extend beyond regular work hours and overlaps with the typical sleep time. There are different kinds of manifestations of shift work sleep disorder depending on shift work schedules like intermittent, permanent, or rotating shifts of work hours.

For most of you, the energy level will dip around the middle of the night between 2 am to 4 am which is the period of deep sleep and post lunch around 1 pm and 3 pm when you generally crave for a post-lunch nap. Although, these periods could vary a bit if you are a Night-owl or a Morning-person.

 It is important for you to get treated if you think you are suffering from Shift work disorder. To find out, here are a few symptoms:

a)You feel drowsy when you are at work or out with your family for social engagements or during your “off-time”.

b)You are often unproductive at work and it is difficult for you to think quickly or make good decisions.

c) It is difficult for you to sleep when you are off your work and are supposed to sleep.

d) You cannot sleep for seven to nine hours at a stretch and often wake up very soon.

e)You have a disturbed sleep and wake up quite a number of times during sleep

f) Feel irritable and moody

g) Your work and sleep schedule has created a lot of trouble in your interpersonal relationships.

Here are a few things you can do to adjust easily:

For night Shifts –

Keep your sleep and wake time same even on the days that you have off. This will help regulate your circadian rhythm, improve the quality of your sleep and will help you be alert during your work hours.

For Rotating Shifts

a)Try to rotate your shift timings clockwise which is shift from a day to an evening to a night shift and not the other way round or without any pattern.

b)When you are about to start a new shift, start adjusting to it gradually. Start three days prior to the new shift date and delay your sleep and wake up time an hour or two each day according to the new schedule.

Some tips to sleep better during the day:

a)Wear dark glasses while you are on your way back home as light has an alerting influence on your circadian rhythm.

b) Use dark light and noise blocking curtains in your bedroom

c)Keep your bedroom as quiet as possible. You can use a white noise machine or a fan to block out sounds too. Try using earplugs as well!

d)Inform your family members about the time when you want to sleep undisturbed. You can also use a ‘do, not disturb-sleeping’ sign on the door

e) Keep the temperature in your bedroom cool.

f) Limit your caffeine consumption as it stays in your body for many hours. Drink caffeine 6-7 hours before you go to sleep.

g)Do not drink alcohol before going to sleep. Alchohol can make you fall asleep but it will make you wake up earlier. You will also have a disturbed sleep eventually with regular consumption.

Sometimes, sleep disorders if left untreated results in other more serious disorders and eventual burnout. If you feel that your sleep problems are not manageable at your personal level, please seek help from a Professional.

Work is as important as ‘NON-work’i.e, Rest!  What do you do when you are not doing any work is very essential to transform your life. A lot of stuff is disrupting your workplace like the change in demography, globalization, technology, automation etc. But this force of Nonwork is also one major factor for disruption of your workspace and a hindrance to your performance.

If you look back in history, you will find that the most creative scientists, thinkers, authors, and politicians were very serious about ‘REST’.Times have changed from what used to be when Einstien or Morrison lived and your day job is completely different than theirs, you can still pick up lessons from their lives and practice.

You should start practicing rest before you have a burnout; if you are already there, still it is a good time to take this seriously and apply strategies that could enable you to Rest. Do it before you eventually crash. We cannot be as fit or swift as Usain bolt but we can always apply some of the tricks that could transform our lives.

Here are a few tips to make  your share of Nonwork time effective:

Take Rest as a Mandate

You will not be able to work hard if you do not take rest seriously. Success and Rest are best friends; Do not treat rest as an absence of work but take it deliberately to be successful.

Be Focussed

Create your daily schedule for uninterrupted periods of focused and specific work rather than a day that is full of distractions and unfocused work. By doing this you will accomplish more in lesser time and make space for rest.

Alternate work and rest

If you want to be creative, alternate intensive work period with a deliberate rest period. If you concentrate really hard on a problem, your subconscious mind will tempt you to work on it.

Start Early

You will be amazingly productive if you get to the office an hour early and return back early. Make it a habit to reach earlier than the time you are supposed to reach.

Detach

Leave your work in the office. If carry your work to your free time, you will be less productive and resilient. When you go on a vacation, don’t attend to emails, phone calls etc. This one rule will make you more resilient and productive at work.

Switch off devices

Disconnect to your devices during Rest time. Our world is obsessed with technology and with technology, we carry all our work along with us. Detachment from work is not possible without detaching from the devices.

Take off from work

Ideally, you should take a vacation from work once every three months. This would increase your energy and make you more resilient to work stressors.

Engage in deep play activities

If you want to have a long and productive life, cultivate hobbies. It could be any activity that is not a part of your work and has the capacity to give you the same psychological rewards but in a relaxing setting and without the frustration of a daily job.

Get plenty of exercise and sleep

Exercise will help your brain perform better due to more intake of oxygen. Sleep deprivation is not going to make you successful. In today’s work-obsessed culture this could be an indicator of commitment to one’s job but it is a myth. Sleep with no only provide rest to your physical body but to your brain as well and will also remove toxins that are accumulated throughout the day.

Take care of your rest time so that you can avoid overwork and burnout later.

Also, read our Blog on Burnout

We have already talked about the positive benefits of vacation in our earlier blogs. All of us want to give our best, work hard, earn more and maintain our status as a high performer. But, you must always remind yourself of an exponential increase in productivity that is an after effect of getting out of your daily routine! A vacation exposes you to novel experiences, which has a direct correlation to your creativity. It will boost your physical and mental health. It will bring back your focus and inspiration.

Having established the importance of a vacation; returning back to your obligations is difficult and sad always.

Here are some tips to help you smoothly glide back into your office/ work:

Schedule an extra “Buffer” day

Try to arrive back to your town a day in advance of joining back to work. Most of the times when going on a vacation, you join your work the next day you return leading to a chaotic time at home and at work too. Keep this extra day after a vacation to unpack your suitcases, doing laundry, checking emails, refueling groceries etc. when you have sorted out the essentials at home, you will be much more at peace in office.

Do not leave any loose ends

Before you go off for the vacation, prioritize your work, check for the deadlines that need to be met before leaving and what can wait till you come back. Finish all the incomplete tasks, check your inbox, and update your co-workers in the project about the status of the project.

List everything

It is impossible for you to finish all incomplete work before going on vacation. Create a list of all the to-do work so that you can start from where you left upon return. Having the clear picture of your tasks will also help you relax during vacations.

Clear and Tidy up clutter

You do not want to return to an onslaught of phone messages, emails and tasks with missed deadlines. Minimize the clutter on your workspace before you leave. Organize and label files so that your teammates can easily access them in your absence. Create an out of office reply for email and phone with details of your time and length of absence.

Get back into work easily

Arrive an hour or two earlier than your normal office hours on the first day at the office after vacation. Use this hour to catch up on emails, important dates on a calendar.  Plan your day before you can actually dive into work again. Take the high priority work first and do it one by one. Do not try to do everything at once as it will make you overwhelmed and stressed.

Do the planning in advance so that you can thank yourself later!

Also read our blog Why vacations are mandatory

Working out and exercising has become more of an Instagram Fix. Celebrities upload their workout days and you follow the league. This fashion statement of sweating out at the gym could actually be doing a lot of good to your Mental health as well. Especially if you are suffering from Anxiety Disorders and Depression.

According to Research, regular exercise is found to reduce anxiety and depression symptoms and will help you deal with it better. You will also have better immunity and sleep better which is again beneficial for your mental health.

Hence, think twice before skipping your next workout session!

The connection of Fitness and Mental Health

Exercise will boost your self-esteem and memory function by reducing depression, anxiety, and help in alleviating negative thoughts. When you go out to workout with people, you meet others on the same platform which will also reduce your social withdrawal.

Exercise releases endorphins i.e, the feel-good hormones which will calm your mind and relax your body. A workout as less as 20 mins will increase the blood circulation in your brain. More blood circulation in your brain will lead to an improvement in your mood and attentiveness.

Even, when you are struggling with excessive anxiety or depression and do not want to get out of bed, convincing yourself is a good idea as it will help you feel much better. Find out what kind of workout works for you.

Some more ways how it can help:

Good, Night’s Sleep:  According to a lot of studies, the more you exercise, the better you will sleep at night. Without proper sleep, you cannot perform at your best. Exercise is going to make you physically tired and help you get a sound sleep. Keep in mind, not to exercise just before you go to bed as it will make you too tired.

Decrease Tension:  Under stress, the muscles of your body contract, adding to the already strained body. Working out releases stored energy and helps your muscle return to the normal stress. This will help you with various diseases like fewer aches, pains, tension, headache and arthritis and many more problems.

Better Frustration Tolerance:  A lot of frustration and anger builds up from your day to day life, Exercise is the best way to release negative energy from your body. Do anything ranging from kickboxing, yoga, jog, run to feel refreshed again. A study also shows that exercise can be a preventive tool against anger building up.

Better Immunity: When you exercise regularly, you will get sick less often. Have you observed it yourself yet? Exercise lowers cortisol levels in your body, which is fight or flight hormone. If this hormone level is high consistently in your body, it has an adverse impact on your immunity system.

Be more confident: When you exercise regularly, you set and complete a task which provides your brain with meaningful mastery experience. Hence, exercise increases your self-efficacy i.e the ability to accomplish a goal set by you successfully.

Many people consider the topic of sex as a taboo. Hence, it increases the lack of education about the topic. Due to which, many people only indulge in sexual activities to reproduce. Hence, after the couple conceives a child, the couple starts to put sexual needs and activities aside. But, it should not be the case as there are many benefits as well as there is an importance of sex in a relationship.

Thus, below are few reasons why sex is important in a relationship:

Better Appearance:

It is a well-known fact that sexual intimacy burns calories. Also, a study has shown when you indulge frequently in sexual activities your body starts to develop immunities and helps your skin generates a radiant glow. Along with it, people who indulge in frequent sexual activity with their partners maintain a healthy lifestyle. Hence, attaining a better appearance.

Releases Stress and Increases Immunity:

Frequent Sexual intimacy helps increase your immunity. For women, studies have shown that sexual orgasm has helped them to ease their migraine pain as well as period cramps. For men, orgasm helps them release their daily tension as well as decrease the risk of prostate cancer. Also, indulging in sexual activity helps fight against flu and the common cold.

Helps Sleep Better:

As mentioned above, sexual intercourse helps relieve stress. Hence, when the person is stress-free, the person is able to sleep better. Also, if the person is able to sleep he/she is able to work more efficiently the next day as the body gets its rest which it asks for.

Creates a Mental Immunity:

Indulging in sexual activity releases chemicals which helps fight stress. A low-stress life results in a general mental well-being. Also, it makes us think positive about our body and increases our confidence. Thus, bringing positive thinking and creating a happy mood in general.

Increases the Bond:

Achieving orgasm releases oxytocin, which makes the person feel more loved. Hence, it increases the bond between the two people where they are able to understand each other much better. Thus, bringing both of the partners together. Which then leads to an overall happiness in the relationship.

Thus, we see that sexual intimacy is very important in any relationship. It keeps the spark alive in the relationship as well as increases the bond between the two partners.

But, too much of everything is bad, hence if you think you are suffering from sex addiction then please visit a mental health professional immediately.

You can Read about Sex Addiction in Women

You can Read about Sex Addiction in Men

Take Our Sex Addiction Test

Read More about Pornographic Addiction.

Image Credits: Pixabay

Lonely people are more likely to die of cardiovascular disease, cancer, respiratory problems and gastric problems than the Non-Lonely. You as a human being are supposed to be connected to other human beings. This need for connectedness is wired so deeply that if you are rejected socially or excluded from society in any way, it hurts like an actual wound. Loneliness kills!

Another research showed that, if you have less than three people whom you could confide in and lean for emotional support, you have double the chances of dying from heart diseases. You also have double the likelihood of dying of all the causes even if age, earnings, and smoking levels are comparable.

Besides, premature death, loneliness is the contributor to many more health-related woes. Lonely people, in general, suffer from more severe symptoms of the same disease than the non-lonely. Chronic Loneliness leads to low immunity, cognitive decline, and dementia. If you feel lonely you have double the chances of developing Alzheimer’s.

Loneliness and depression often go hand in hand. Hence, Loneliness is a Psychological condition in which you feel empty, have feelings of lack of control, perceive yourself as worthless; similar to some of the symptoms of depression. Although depression does not necessarily predict loneliness. Loneliness leads to an increase in symptoms of depression apart from increased stress, anxiety and anger.

What is Loneliness?

Loneliness is not just being alone. Traditionally you must have come to believe that Loneliness effects those who are unmarried, divorced, having less extended family etc. But Loneliness is your subjective experience and is exclusive of the fact that you are married, divorced, widowed etc. Loneliness is then a perceptual state that depends more on the quality of your relationships and not just the number of connections you have. You can also feel lonely with a vast social network and hundreds of friends. The subjective loneliness you experience is a big risk factor than actual social  Isolation. It is more about how you feel than what your social connections look like.

How  to Fight Loneliness

Talk to strangers

Talk to someone sitting next to you on the bus on the route to the office. Small talk does more good than it looks like. You will feel much better after talking for only 30 seconds with someone than an hour of online interaction.

Converse for seven minutes

It takes seven minutes to know that the conversation is going to be interesting or not. You reveal yourself after those initial hitches and hulls and start to connect at a deeper level.

Choose face time

Being there is person Is the best way of communication, but when this is not possible choose FACETIME by video call.

Use social media Wisely’

Create smaller social networks within the large ones. Sharing opinions, reactions with a selective group of people is more meaningful.

Know your neighbor

Research found out that better connections in neighborhood lower your risk of cardiovascular diseases. Arrange for a coffee terrace party with your neighbors and you will find yourself healthier and happier.

Invite for a Dinner

Eating together is a form of social collective event that brings people closer.

Be Creative

Organize a craft night with a closed group having common interests. Any form of art will help you connect with other people without actually talking about yourself.

“ When someone else pays attention to you and in turn allows you to connect to them through shared experience the human circuit gets completed; so you are connected “

Talk out

Just talk about your feelings and you will feel much less lonely. Call a friend for a date, or speak to your parents, colleagues to tell how you feel, share the load.

Touch –Literally

Touch is a powerful medicine. Hence, Pat someone on the back, hold their hands or hug. Physical touch will lower your physiological stress, will increase immunity, help you recover from inflammation and infection. It will release oxytocin; the feel-good hormone which in turn will strengthen your social bonds.

Women an Men not only differ in their Physical make-up but greatly differ in their Psychological Makeup. The patterns of mental distress found in women are also highly different from the patterns in women. Women generally tend to Internalize their Problems while Men are Externalizers.

The way your brain is biologically wired is actually different from a woman. Hence, You deal with relationships, express emotions and react to stress differently.

These factors are both the Cause and Effect of the particular mental illnesses described below:

Addiction Or Substance Abuse

According to statistics, its 3 to 1 in comparison to women. Research suggests that men often turn to substance abuse as a response to the major life stressors of Unemployment and Divorce. Also, Men often have more negative outcomes in the Family courts as the custody of children is mostly with the mother. The visitation rights of the Men is also very restrictive which is a soul-destroying condition. Men become very isolated from the society in both these conditions of financial instability and failure of a relationship.

Depression & Suicide

Consistent exposure to stress and sadness results in Depression but at certain times it could also be a chemical change in brain chemistry. As a result of the above conditions in male, a major endemic that has come to surface is of suicide.  The suicide rates in India has risen from 7.9 % in 1987 to 11 % now. The ratio of Men to Women in the population is 2 to 1. Men do not address the problem and try to solve, but generally, tend to defer the problem and their emotions too. They more often share good times with their peers instead of the bad experiences as they have a tendency to be strong in all situations. In attempting to remain rock-solid and strong, they tend to ignore their feelings and hence often take the route to end their lives.

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

This disorder is also one of the disorders more common in men. Younger Males are more likely to suffer from this Disorder among the Population of men. OCD maybe commonly termed as an excessive amount of Fear and anxiety associated with anything. People with OCD have a fear that is related to a specific thing or an event. In Normal condition, if you have a fear that you have left the doors or window open; you would go back and lock the same and forget about it. But a person suffering from OCD needs to recheck the doors and windows several times to be able to feel relieved

Undifferentiated Schizophrenia

In this you will experience a range of symptoms including Hallucinations,delusions,lack of focus,speech disorganization and an abnormality of movement and behavior that is caused by your disturbed mental state. This cause of this disorder can be rooted in the environment, genes or a chemical imbalance in the brain. Research shows that Men are 1.4 times more prone to suffer than women.

Bipolar Disorder

In this disorder, you may experience sudden and extreme changes in mood. It might switch from sudden unnatural happiness without any reason to extremely sad or depressed state. Men suffer more from this disorder than Women. An episode of extreme elation also known as hypomania, you will experience fast thoughts, excessive physical activity, reckless activities including sex and spending etc. Conversely, during a Depressive episode, you will have very low energy, feel sad and empty, be tired all the time, and have suicidal thoughts or thoughts of death

If you or any  person near you suffers from any of these conditions,visit an expert. Help is always near you.

“Father,  just like mothers, are not born. Males grow into fathers and fathering is a very significant stage in their development.”  David Gottesman

Happy Father’s day to all of you! The Superhero of Our Lives.

You as a father along with the mother are the most important person in a child’s life. The father is the first man in a child’s life and the Mother is the first woman the child will encounter. The role of the mother has been of nurturing through feeding, love and that of a father has been of engaging and supporting through more as “PLAY” & guidance.

Although, the role of the father has changed over time. Now, Fathers do more of hands-on caregiving now; like changing nappies, visiting the doctor, dropping and picking up and helping children with their academics.

Role of a father

Generally, you might find that the role of a father in the child’s world is like a second-class citizen;

Research Says…

that if the child has a father who is more involved; the child grows up to be more emotionally secure. Thus, being more confident in reaching out to his surroundings. Also, he has a better emotional intelligence and good social connections.

Since the father is often in the role of playing with children, he has an impact on child’s social and emotional development. Fathers spend a lot of time interacting one-on-one with toddlers and therefore children model a lot of their feelings and behavior.

If you are actively involved in your child’s life in adolescence, it will result in better intellectual functioning, good verbal skills and greater achievements in life.

As already mentioned,  father is the first male role model in a child’s life.  For an adolescent boy, he aids in building positive gender-role features and in adolescent girls his role is to imprint a positive opinion of men.

As a father, you are also a trainer to your child, their coach. You are the person to whom the child will look up to for problem-solving and enduring difficult situations. It is your duty to teach them how to take the bigger challenges in life and teach them life skills that are necessary for his future.

As a Father to the Family

Therefore, along with being your child’s father, your role as a father is to be a good husband to their mother. Also, How you as a father bond with their mother will set parameters in their mind of interpersonal relationships. Your child will know what to expect from their partners and what is the best way to bond with their spouses in a long-term relationship.

Hence, When you along with the mother are able to bring up a happy, healthy, and loving kid in the society, you do great service to society. One father and one family at a time will make the world a better place to live in.

Learn more about Mentriq and Dr Prerna Kohli.

“Friendship is a very important relationship. But not everyone is blessed with one. So, what is the most important component that is vital to a friendship? It is commitment. Commitment is important for all long-term and fulfilling relationships.”

If you wish to cultivate real friendships, you need to be obliged to each other in a healthy and meaningful way. You need to devote energy, time, thoughts, to the needs and desires of your friend. In reward for this, you will get a satisfying and rich relationship for a lifetime.

Let us say that you bought a new car and it has great looks, good mileage etc, but it will not be nice if you do not take care of it. You have to do minor repairs before there is a major breakdown, change the oil etc to keep it running smooth. When you do such minor maintenance work regularly the car will have a long life and would be more reliable.

A friendship is also like that. You have to take care of your friend and your friendship so that it keeps going smoothly. You have to sort out minor problems before they become major resentments.

Here are some of the things you can do to make your friendships healthy:

Be in contact

Connect with your friends in small intervals. It might be difficult for you to get a lot of time to sit and chat with them but you can always make quick texts, emails etc. A very important part of friendship is sharing. Your friends want to know and share important information about his life and your life. It is also true that, with good friends, you will always pick up from where you left but by then you will lose out on several years of companionship.

Don’t keep scores

Don’t calculate and make a profit and loss statement of who did what. You can always make a phone call even when your friend could not manage to. When you give something unconditionally, it often balances out in unexpected ways. There can always be genuine reasons behind why your friend cannot call you back. Friendships will not work if you always try to make it even.

Always be Balanced

It is very important to keep it equal in friendship. Friendship should be healthy enough to shift roles easily. Share your stories and listen mindfully. Do not feel inferior or superior to each other and look up to each other for wisdom and understanding. True friendship is walking side by side.

Maintain Loyalty

Loyalty is the most important ingredient of a good friendship. Do not talk about your friend in a negative way to others. Do not float rumours or gossip about your friend and stand up for each other at all times. Accept the faults of your friend and do not make it a topic to gossip about.

Remember your friend’s birthday

Remember important things in your friend’s life and wish them. Regular small gestures are also as important as special events. Send them a thoughtful card to remind them of how special they are.

Resolve Conflict

Human relationship is not possible without conflict. Do not let small resentments grow into bigger ones. Give each other space and agree to disagree. Work through your resentments than break it off.

Be an admirer

Do not compare yourself with your friend instead be his/her fan. Admire their achievements and appreciate them. Cheer each other up in bad times.

The “Golden rule” for a long-term friendship is to treat your friend as he/she wants to be treated. Pay attention to their qualities and be with them in times of their troubles. Accept the person who your friend is as complete.